my quote of the moment: "if you can attain repose and calm, believe that you have seized happiness." ~julie-jeanne-eleonore de lespinasse

October 21, 2010

all out of sorts

allow me to complain:

my neck hurts and my head hurts and i think i'm getting sick.

my house is either too cold or too hot and there's one lone fly zooming around that i just can't seem to get rid of.

fishie is on the move, almost crawling, almost standing, but getting into everything. and i'm tired of having to vacuum ten times a day because she keeps finding random little bits of things to put in her mouth.

and lumpy needs to learn the art of a conversation, not just walk up and start talking to me and continue talking to me even if i'm in the middle of doing something. and he needs to learn that if he wants to tell me something it's fine, but he randomly comes up and tells me something that he remembered from five days ago that i don't even recall, and then he just walks away, because all he wanted to do was tell me, he didn't care that i don't respond. or he starts talking and i feel the need to pay attention.

and i hate the fact that, because he doesn't care if i don't respond and that he does it all day long, i don't stop and pay attention to him all the time like i know i should. even if he doesn't realize it, i know what i'm doing and i'm more than kind of ashamed.

and i think i've been spending too much time on a message board that i used to frequent but left because i never had the time. well, i've found the time, so i'm catching up with friends and finding out all the things i've missed. but it causes me to type lyk this b/c it's shorter and easier and it's how it goes there... and it's an awful style to have... but it's mine and it's hard to stop once i get going... it's bad enough i don't capitalize stuffs >_>

and i need to learn some tricks or something that can make me focus. i've never really been able to focus on things or pay attention, my mind constantly wanders. i think that's why i have such trouble even stringing together paragraphs here to make some sort of sensical post. it's funny too, because now everyone is saying that too much screen time shortens children's attention spans, but i never watched much tv and grew up before the internet was big, so i sometimes wonder what my problem is. maybe i'll never know. or maybe i could figure it out if i didn't keep getting distracted by a shiny bit of string.

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