my quote of the moment: "if you can attain repose and calm, believe that you have seized happiness." ~julie-jeanne-eleonore de lespinasse

March 20, 2012

the black thumb of death

it should be no secret now that my family and i are going through the house buying process. it is exciting and scary and as confusing as can be. dear hubby and i have never done this before, so we really are relying heavily on the help and advice of those much more knowledgeable than ourselves.

and because this is the first house we can really call our very own, we've started to dream. how we want it to look, what improvements we want to make, how we want to use the space we've got. and we do have to be smart about how we use the space, because it's not a huge amount of house. it's certainly bigger than what we had before, and looking around it seems there's so much potential in those blank walls.

which is honestly the scariest part in my mind, and it's a shortcoming i've had that i'm still trying to get over. there is so much potential, only limited by space and money, of all the different things we could do. but then, what if we choose to do something and don't like it? or it doesn't work? and then we're stuck with all our bad decisions staring us in the face for the rest of our lives.

and then i proceed to hyperventilate.

and so, instead, i've been focusing on the furniture arrangement, how i want to put what we've got and where i want it. because if i don't like it, it can move. so it's something much less permanent and more manageable for my hyperactive imagination that goes from good idea to worst case scenario constantly.

my dear husband, on the other hand, has started to dream about a garden. which is kind of funny for him, because we've had homes with bits of land before that we could have planted a few things on, and he was never interested. now though, with this new house, we have a yard with a fence all the way around it. it's not a very big yard, but it's all ours and very clearly marked. and so he's decided he wants a vegetable garden.

honestly, i blame my mother. she's super into gardening. she's landscaped most of the places she's lived all by herself (with help for the physical labor). she also has a huge garden. last year the boys helped her plant a few things, and they loved to help pick stuff when it was ripe. and my hubby and i helped her build the raised boxes she's growing in, and also helped to build a deer proof fence around the whole thing. and she's expanded this year by putting in a strawberry patch, in addition to the snap peas, tomatoes, cucumbers, various peppers, carrots, squash, zucchini, lettuce, horseradish, onions, and pumpkins she'll have. last year she tried corn, which the squirrels climbed over the fence and ate, and also sunflowers, which didn't grow so well for a couple of reasons.

so my hubby wants to put a few raised boxes in our yard to grow some vegetables. i think we're going to limit ourselves to tomatoes, peppers, cucumbers, and zucchini, and maybe a little lettuce. i say "we," though i really mean "he." if i were to try and help, i know everything would die. my mother was gifted with a very green thumb, but me, not so much. early on in our relationship, my hubby realized that if he wanted to give me flowers, they should just be fake if we wanted them to look nice after three days.

he and my mother are making a great plan on how things will work, what we have to do and when we have to do them. and hopefully, if they need my help, they will give me detailed instructions so i don't mess things up. because i really do like fresh veggies, and if i can get them into my kitchen, then i'll definitely be in my comfort zone.

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